It really doesn't feel like a year has gone by since he passed away, and I have thought of him every day since the last time I saw him, with mixed emotions of joy from remembering the happiness he brought into my life, and overwhelming sadness that he is no longer with us and the fact that I know I'll never see him again.

Keith, my Grampy, who was everything I could've asked for in a grandparent, was an incredibly supportive figure in my life and was always there for me when I needed him. Visiting him and Nanny was always something I looked forward to and I loved walking through the door with my siblings, bolting through the door and giving him a warm hug whilst he was sat on his chair in the living room watching football or the Grand Prix (two things he very much enjoyed to watch on TV!). Walking through the front door of Nanny's house now is still something I look forward to, but a part of me still gets surprised and confused for a split second when he's not present in his comfy chair with little Toby on his lap, before I remember a second later that he is gone.

Grampy and I shared a passion for karate which he passed on to me around 5 years ago and he'd pick me up with Nanny every Friday afternoon after school in order to take me to my karate session in the evening, which I thoroughly enjoyed. He'd always be so proud of me and comment on how well I was doing, which made me feel proud of myself. We'd often train in the summer in the back garden or in the living room with cushions as punch bags and watch Youtube videos together about katas in karate. But since he died, I feel like my passion for karate may have faded away along with him as it isn't the same when I'm training because he isn't there to watch me and give me feedback. I would imagine that he's sat in the room like he used to be when he was alive, but it's just too painful to wish for things like that. It's been a year but I still struggle to accept that he's gone forever.

Perhaps I tried to return to the hobby before I was emotionally ready to come back. Either way, I remain ambitious to earn my black belt (I'm so close!) and proudly wear his belt which held and still holds so much sentimental value to him and to me, and I'll cherish it forever.

I went on a bit of a tangent there, but that gives a bit of an insight of what my relationship was like with Keith, my Grampy, who I miss so much. I know he wouldn't want me to tear up or cry whilst thinking about the past, so I'm trying to be strong for him as I know he always wanted me to be happy and would hate to know how much his death has impacted me and everyone else in the family, but we all cared for him immensely and love him. I'm going to attach a range of photos below of him with me, Kaitlyn and Hamilton. I'm also going to attach a recording of a piece of music I composed in early 2021 in a different post which was forgotten about in the funeral so I didn't get the chance to play it, but anyone who wants to will be able to listen to it today.

Thank you for reading this,

Love from Kimmy (or Kimbo, as Grampy would call me! xxx)